My Jacob, My Safe Harbor
by hannahgrace456
Summary: This is a story about Bella and Jacob. Will they get together? If so, will it last? What if something gets in their way? This is a repost of a story that I put up earlier, but there were problems with the upload and I had to re-upload it. Read and review!
1. Chapter 1

**This is a story about Bella and Jacob. The cliff diving has already happened. Alice has not come back, and she will not return, at least not at the same point she does in New Moon. The pack is aware of Victoria, however she will not be focused on as much in my story - it's mainly about Bella and Jacob's relationship. She will still be mentioned and dealt with, but she will probably not be brought up in every chapter. If there are any questions of the timing or sequence of events, just let me know.**

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It was a typical Saturday in Forks. Luckily, this weekend Jacob and I didn't have homework and could spend our days goofing off and laying around. The rain was pounding hard against the windows of my living room and Jacob's close proximity was keeping me warm.

"This movie's lame, Bella. Why do you like it so much?" He asked me while we watched the 2005 adaptation of _Pride and Prejudice_. Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy were at Rosings fighting. The scene on screen looked very similar to the one outside my window, except there weren't any 19th century adversarial lovers in my front yard.

"Oh, shut up. It's amazing. I bet you like seeing all the girls in the movie," I teased. We were sitting on the couch and had the house to ourselves. Charlie had headed out on a weekend long fishing trip with Billy and some other friends. Jacob had the bowl of popcorn in his huge hands, keeping it from me.

"Hey, don't hog the movie marathon snacks." I reached over to grab the bowl but Jacob thrust it above his head and I didn't stand a chance.

"What are you gonna do, shortie? Hmm?" I loved Jacob when he was like this. He was so happy and joking. I hated it when he was tense and angry. It made me think of the time when he left me standing alone and hurt at the side of his house, the time right after he had discovered he was a werewolf.

Finally, he put the bowl in my lap and laid his arms back down, settling back into the sofa. "Give it back, though. Counting the colonels is more entertaining than this movie you're obsessed with." Jacob put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me closer. Before, this gesture would have made me nervous, but now I was so much more comfortable with this part of our relationship. The lines between friend and lover were blurring between us. We basically acted like boyfriend and girlfriend, except we have never even kissed. A day didn't go by that I wasn't asked by someone if we were dating. I didn't mind that too much anymore, though, because I knew how we looked to other people. Even Charlie asked me the same question every now and then.

Jacob mockingly imitated the characters through the rest of the movie and I proceeded to punch him in the arm or ruffle his hair. The rain had slowed and the house grew quieter. We had finally reached the last scene of the movie.

"Aww, gross! I don't want to see these people be lovey-dovey! They don't even like each other!" Jacob jumped up and walked across the living room into the kitchen where I assumed he was getting more food.

"No, in _your_ version of the story they don't like each other. They come to their senses, eventually," I corrected. I got up and followed him into the kitchen, sitting down at the dining room table. Jake stood at the doorway of the small pantry, contemplating what food to devour next. Seriously, he ate more than anyone I had ever known.

"Your food stock is lacking, Bella. I'm disappointed in you. I thought you were better than this," he said, pulling out a bag of dried cranberries and pointing at them.

"Hey, don't knock 'em till you've tried 'em. Do you want me to make you a sandwich or something?" I asked, growing more hungry myself.

"You would do that? For me?" He joked, coming over to take my spot at the table.

"Don't I still owe you? Aren't I your slave or something?" I asked, remembering our age versus maturity game from the early days of our friendship.

"True, very true, but if you make a _really_ good sandwich, I might end your sentence by the time you have to enter a retirement home," he remarked, pretending to be serious. I pulled all the needed ingredients out of the fridge and cupboards and started making our food. Jacob got up to get drinks and lay out the napkins.

I struggled to open the mayonnaise jar, but when I finally pried it open, it slipped from my grasp and splattered all over the floor. Luckily, I was wearing big slippers and the jar was plastic, so it didn't get on my feet.

"Oh, crap," I grumbled, walking over to the sink to grab a rag. This plan failed and I felt my undependable legs slip from underneath me and I landed on the floor in the mess. Jacob hurried towards me and sat down on the floor next to me.

"Are you okay, Bells?" he asked worriedly. He smoothed out my hair with his hands and lifted his arm up to get the towel off the counter.

"Yeah, I'm fine. You know I wouldn't be Bella Swan without an accident a day," I joked. Mishaps were a part of my daily routine, and now I didn't even notice when a new bruise spread across my skin. I looked over and saw Jacob sitting in the spilled remains next to me. "What are you doing on the floor? You're getting your clothes dirty!"

"So? It's no big deal," he said nonchalantly. I envied his ability to treat things like they were nothing of consequence. Where I was worried and tense, Jake was relaxed and easy going. He perfectly balanced out my overly concerned nature. Knowing this, I carefully stood up and gathered the sandwich stuff off of the counter and set it on the ground next to us. I opened all the other jars and turkey container and began making our lunch on a paper towel on the floor. Jacob laughed at my childlike ways, but reached over to help me.

"You're so ridiculous, Bella. Only you would make something good out of your clumsiness."

"You know me; I like to look on the bright side, be positive, silver lining, all that good stuff." And the more time I spent with Jacob, the more true this statement had become. Usually, everything that went wrong was a catastrophe, but Jacob was so lighthearted and didn't perseverate over things.

We ate our disheveled, messy lunch on the floor while teasing each other and reenacting scenes from _Pride and Prejudice_ in the most absurd manner - Jacob played Elizabeth, and I was Mrs. Bennett. Charlie called once, just to check in on me and make sure everything was going okay. I told him I was fine and reassured him that the house was still in order. My statement couldn't be farther than the truth - since Jacob's arrival this morning it had turned into a complete disaster. We had board games and piles of DVDs scattered all over the floor, not to mention the mess I had just made. I looked down and saw the food all over my and Jake's clothes.

"I guess I better clean this up. It's going to start smelling soon. Maybe you should go upstairs and shower. You can wear some of Charlie's clothes while I wash yours." I knew Charlie's clothes would barely cover him, but it was better than nothing and I didn't want him to leave.

"How about I just run home real quick and change? That way we can both get rid of this grossness. We can do karaoke or something when I get back," he said, lifting his hand to his mouth to make an imaginary mic.

"Singing horribly? My pleasure. But hurry up - don't take too long beautifying yourself." He just laughed and I walked him to the door. I watched as he ran down the street and faded into the distance. It was almost impossible to believe that a person could run that fast. If it weren't for my discovery of supernatural beings, I would've thought I was dreaming.

Oops, I slipped. I tried to avoid thinking about Edward and all that he had introduced me to whenever possible. I was only happy and unhindered by my past when Jacob was around. Without him, it was easy to spiral into sadness. I wiped these thoughts from my mind before they could get any worse and started cleaning up the kitchen. I dragged myself upstairs to shower and then came back down to start cleaning up the living room. My mind wandered between thoughts of Jacob and school. I made mental lists of things I needed at the store and prescriptions I was supposed to pick up for Charlie.

"Boo!" Jacob's loud voice reverberated off the walls and scared me into breathlessness. I shrieked loudly and jumped around in place.

"Jacob! What on earth is wrong with you? You know you can't do that to me!" I shouted except it was in shock, not anger.

"Oh, I'm sorry," he said sympathetically, even though he was still smiling. He pulled me towards his chest and placed his hand against my head. I could hear his beating heart against my ear and unlike mine, it was beating at a relatively normal pace. "I didn't know you'd get so hysterical, Bells, sheesh."

"It's fine, don't worry about it," I said, finally calm. He walked us over to the couch and I leaned against him. "What should we do? Are you already hungry again for dinner?"

"No, that won't happen for at least ten minutes. You won't have to serve me again for awhile," he teased.

"Darn, that's what I live for," I retorted. "You want to go to the store with me? I need to pick up some stuff. And of course I wouldn't want you to die of hunger on my watch." This would seem dramatic to anyone else, but with Jacob I could actually imagine him in crippling pain because I didn't have enough food here to sustain his appetite.

"Sure, whatever," he agreed. I gathered my purse and jacket and we headed out to my truck. Jacob insisted on driving because I "didn't know a brake from a blinker." I appeased him and let him take us there. I had to admit, he got us to the store faster than I ever had even though he wasn't speeding. Once inside, I pulled out my list and gathered everything I needed while Jake pushed the cart behind me. When I was taking too long contemplating which squash to get or trying to pick out a soup, he would bump the cart against my backside and hurry me along.

"Are you staying for dinner at my house, Jake?" I asked. Normally I didn't mind Charlie's trips and being alone, but Jacob was such a wonderful person to have around to fight off the dreariness of the winter weather. Also, Billy wasn't home and I wondered how he would be able to fend for himself with dinner.

"I suppose I could grace you with my presence. What are we having?"

"Oh, Prince Jake, how could you incline yourself so?" I said lamely. "But I don't know, what do you want? I'm not used to picking out dinner for myself, so I have no idea what to get."

"I say we just pick five random items and throw 'em in a pot. That's what your cooking tastes like anyway." He quickly turned away to hide his huge grin, but I saw it before he did.

"You know, Jake, the next time you make fun of me I might leave you to fight off the munchies yourself," I threatened lightheartedly. After a few more minutes of banter and cart bumping, we finally settled on dinner: ravioli and Caesar salad. Thankfully the line at the checkout was short and we got back home quickly because Jacob's hunger was growing and he was getting impatient.

I threw dinner together in a hurry while Jake sat at the table and read me last week's comics from the newspaper. If it weren't for the funny jokes and impressions he did, they would've been pretty boring.

"I didn't realize how late is was," I said as we sat down to eat. It was eight thirty and pitch black outside.

"Mmhmm," he mumbled. I should've known by now he couldn't be bothered while he ate.

"Do you want to spend the night here, Jake? I mean, you don't have a car to get home and Billy's not waiting for you. I get kind of freaked out alone here at night with the rain and all. You can stay if you want," I offered. I knew the car excuse was moot - Jake could run faster than any car could drive - but I didn't feel like being alone.

"Uh, okay. I'll just sleep on the couch, I guess." He seemed surprised by my suggestion but thankfully didn't turn it down.

"No, Jake, you can sleep in Charlie's room. He won't mind and I just washed his sheets yesterday. They're old man cootie free," I said lamely.

"Okay, whatever. Or better yet, how about we try to stay up all night? Whoever falls asleep first has to make breakfast in the morning," he suggested. The last time he'd stayed up with someone it was most likely one of the pack. He seemed excited to be spending the night at someone's house other than theirs.

"Deal," I agreed, reaching my hand out to shake his. I knew I'd be making breakfast regardless, so it didn't do any harm to humor him.

After cleaning up the kitchen - again - we ambled back into the living room. Jacob laid down and rested his feet on my lap. I had never noticed how huge he was until he tried to sprawl out on the sofa with me crammed on the opposite end. Despite this, we were still comfortable and I started massaging his feet.

"You don't have to do that, Bells. I feel like I use you too much," he said empathetically.

"Are you kidding, Jake? You do more for me than anyone else and you're always so worn out. Why don't you just relax?" I tossed him the remote and a car magazine from the coffee table. He flicked through the channels before settling on some action flick. For a while we talked about school and predicted what Charlie and Billy were doing, but eventually we drifted into a comfortable silence. As the end credits played, I looked over and saw that he had fallen asleep. He looked so peaceful and innocent, like a child. He looked so perfect that I wanted to take a picture of him, but didn't want to cause any disturbance. I stared at him for a few moments before reaching over and carefully pulling the remote out of his hand, turned off the TV. I gently rested my palm against his cheek, his warmth filling me even more than before. I never understood why people enjoyed seeing the ones they loved sleep, but now it made sense - when he was calm, so was I. He never looked more beautiful than he did now. All the hard lines from earlier frustrations - like the pack - disappeared and his face was placid.

It would be best to turn out the lights and get him a blanket, I decided. I knew he wouldn't need one, but I couldn't just leave him without it. I went to the hall closet to pull out a sleeping bag for myself and a light blanket for him. I was careful not to wake him up as I covered him with it. As quietly as possible, I went up to my room to change into pajamas.

I wanted Jacob and I to remain happy like this forever. He was blissful and so was I. There were no problems between us; even Victoria wasn't a worry to me at the moment. I wished Sunday didn't have to come tomorrow. Jacob and I were so happy in our own little world, free of work and unwelcome disturbances.

I crept back down the stairs into the dark living room. The only thing that illuminated the room was a tiny light from the kitchen - I left it on in case Jake woke up and was confused or needed something. I laid out my sleeping bag on the floor next to the sofa, hoping that Jake wouldn't topple onto me in his sleep. He was lightly snoring and hadn't moved an inch since I had left earlier. I bent down and kissed his cheek before settling into my sleeping bag.

My dream tonight was the same as it was every other time. I ambled around the forest with purpose, but didn't know what it was. My breath was short and the darkness was closing in around me, making me even more panicky and scared. I passed into a field of emptiness. No one was waiting there like I hoped. There were no trees, no grass, no animals, not even clouds in the sky. The panic begins to choke me and I let out a scream.

Edward was gone.

"Bella! Bella! Wake up!" Jacob shook me into consciousness and looked almost as hysterical as I felt. A thin sheet of sweat covered my body and I realized that I had rolled out of my sleeping bag. "Bella, honey, are you okay? What was your dream? Did he hurt you? Why are you crying?"

It was then that I realized tears were covering my face and neck, some dry, others fresh. This brought on a new wave of tears as I saw the pain in Jacob's face. Inevitably I had screamed out for Edward, crushing Jacob more than I would ever understand.

"Come here, Bells, it's okay. Everything is okay," he murmured, scooping me up into his arms. He ran his hand through my hair and his touch slowly calmed me down, but I couldn't stop crying.

"I'm sorry, Jake," I hiccuped between sobs. He carried us to the couch and cradled me like a small child. My knuckles were tight and white, clamped onto Jacob's thin t-shirt. I tried to loosen my grip on him, but was unsuccessful.

"Why are you sorry? You didn't do anything wrong," he said seriously, resting his head on mine.

"I woke you up. You're so busy now and tired. You had a chance to sleep and I've ruined it," I said apologetically. "What time is it? You can go back to bed and I'll go upstairs." I scrambled to fix the situation, hoping he would be able to fall asleep again. I tried to escape from his grasp, but he just held me tighter.

"Bella, it's fine. Really. We can just stay here. I'll hold you and you can go back to sleep." He was so good to me, more so than I deserved. Here I am, crushing his spirits and waking him from his much needed rest, and he was taking care of _me_. I was so unfair to him - too needy, too demanding.

Edward came into my mind. He had held me while I slept a countless number of times. I immediately felt guilt for thinking of him when Jacob was doing everything he could to help me. No matter where I turned, what I did, someone had to get hurt. The Cullens, Charlie, and now Jacob, were all victims of my behavior and existence.

Still, I couldn't bear to move now that Jacob had offered to rock me back to sleep. He stroked me hair and ran his fingers down my arms in a peaceful, attentive manner. My heavy eyes eventually closed and I drifted off, praying no more nightmares would follow.

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**I hope you liked it! Please don't forget to review - I've just started writing (like, last week) and appreciate your feedback. **


	2. Chapter 2

I awoke the next morning to rain pounding on the windows, something that still annoyed me despite living in Forks for over a year. Jacob was still still snoring softly, me still in his lap. I was all warm and toasty in his embrace. He was so good to me, and I repaid him in the worst of ways. I half-hoped that he would bring up my outburst from last night just so I could profusely apologize to him. He deserved much more than an apology of course, and I could only hope to find a way to make it up to him.

Realizing that Jake had lost the bet but I disturbed him in the worst of ways, I got up to make breakfast. _What did he like to eat in the morning, anyway?_ I wondered. I couldn't imagine he was too biased when it came to food. I couldn't go wrong with making every breakfast dish in the kitchen.

Conscientious not to wake him again, I lightly unwrapped his arms from around me and stood up from the couch. He let out a low moan and sighed. Quietly, I tiptoed upstairs to the bathroom to brush my teeth and hair.

"Ugh," I groaned at the mirror. My hair was a matted mess and my face looked puffy. Quickly, I brushed out the snarls and scrubbed my teeth. I left my pajamas on - I was going to cooking so there was no point in getting dressed. Jake wouldn't care what I looked like anyway - he would be too busy scarfing down food and hopefully not thinking about what happened last night.

Back in the kitchen, I pulled out every breakfast ingredient I could find: flour, butter, eggs, bread, chocolate chips, bacon, blueberries, the whole bit. As quietly as possible, I began making pancakes and gazed out the window.

How upset would he be when he woke up? Would he be angry or sad about my hysterical outburst? Probably a combination of both, I decided. Hearing me long for Edward when he was trying so hard to help me forget probably wasn't the most satisfying of emotions.

I mindlessly finished mixing the pancakes and set them on the stove. While they sizzled, I laid out all the fruit, juice, and milk on the table. Maybe this would offset any negative feelings from Jacob when he woke up.

The phone's ring blared loudly and startled me. I rushed to the counter to answer before Jake could wake up from it. Who would be calling at this hour anyway? It was barely eight o'clock on a Sunday morning. _Probably, Charlie,_ I thought.

"Hello," I whispered quietly into the phone. I hurried up the stairs to get away from Jacob's hearing range.

"Hey, Bella. I was just calling to see how you were doing." My guess was right. Charlie's voice was partly drowned out by the sound of wind in the background. "What'd you do last night?"

"Oh, you know, Jake came over and we hung out. I'm making breakfast for us right now." I very carefully evaded actually saying that he spent the night. Charlie would either be all too pleased that we were growing closer, or horrified that I let a boy spend the night, especially when he wasn't around. Little did he know that this had happened countless times before.

"Well, okay." Thankfully he was clueless to the fact that Jacob was hear overnight. "It's getting pretty stormy up here. We might not be able to get back until tomorrow morning, okay?"

"Alright, Dad, I have to go. I have stuff on the stove."

"Well, I'll talk to you when I get back. You guys be good."

"Okay, bye," I said, already half way down the stairs. I hung up and turned the ringer off on the phone to avoid anymore possible disturbances.

I walked back into the kitchen and saw that my quieting efforts were too little, too late. Jake was sitting at table shoveling food onto his plate.

"Why are you up already? You only got a few hours of sleep," I chided.

"I don't know. I heard the phone and smelled bacon. There's no way I'm going to sleep through that." He didn't seem upset, but I couldn't be sure. I sat down next to him and put my elbows on the table.

"So... last night," I said awkwardly. He looked up at me and his fork clanged on the plate. His reaction only worsened my nerves.

"It's fine, Bella, really." It was quite obvious that he was trying to pass it off as no big deal, but his true feelings were written on his face.

"No, Jacob, it's not fine. You're trying so hard to help me and I keep screwing up. Let me apologize. I'll do anything to make it up to you."

Silence lingered in the air for a few moments before he spoke again.

"Do you still miss him?" he asked quietly.

The question surprised me. Of course I missed Edward, but why would Jacob want me to say that to his face? I had come to accept that he was never coming back to me; it wasn't even an issue anymore.

"That's not important," I mumbled, my eyes downcast to the floor.

"Yes it is, Bella. How can you say that's not important? Our lives would be perfect if it wasn't for him!" His voice was getting louder, more frustrated. I buried my face in my hands and then looked up, past Jacob and out the window at the dismal weather. It mirrored my feelings perfectly: dreary and worn out.

"Not now, okay, Jake? Just eat your breakfast," I pleaded. He didn't budge. He sat there, staring at me, his eyes growing more incredulous as the seconds ticked by.

"What are we to each other? Why am I here?" he asked suddenly.

His question caught me off guard. What was he? A friend? No, he was far more than that, but was the love I felt for him the same I felt for Edward? It didn't seem possible. Edward's love was all encompassing; my whole world revolved around him. I had slowly learned to live without him around, and that was only done with Jacob's help and patience.

"I don't know, Jacob," I said honestly. The house went silent. The only sounds to be heard were the ticking of the clock and rain hitting the windows.

"You're still in love with him," he stated matter-of-factly. It wasn't a question. The hole in my chest burned, threatening to disintegrate the slow but sure repairing Jacob had done and I wrapped my arms around my torso. Tears pricked my eyes and a chill went over my body despite Jacob's close proximity.

"I don't know how to stop," I said quietly. Rather than angry, he looked sympathetic, but I could still see the frustration in his eyes.

"I have to go, Bella. Let me know when you decide who you want." He stood up, walked across the kitchen and out the front door. It clicked shut with what seemed like a deafening sound.

That was it. I blew it. I pushed him too far and he gave up. I wasn't going to have him either way: as a friend or as a boyfriend. It wasn't fair for me to torture him like this. I couldn't just say he was my friend when it was so obvious that he was something more, especially when I knew that was what he wanted.

I sat paralyzed at the table. Sound and time and vision all blurred together and my head was spinning. Everyone I truly cared about had left. There was no one here, not even Charlie, however his leave was out of leisure rather than pain, but it stung just the same.

I had to make a choice. I either had all of Jacob or none at all, I decided. It wasn't fair to him or to me to leave this issue hanging by a thread.

Jacob's departure made me realize something. I _was_ in love with him - that's why his leaving hurt so much. If he was just a friend, I wouldn't feel this way. He was so much more than that. Now it was obvious, as though I was looking for a pencil that was in my hand the whole time.

I was ready. I was ready to _be_ with Jacob. Our relationship most certainly wasn't just platonic anymore. I had to give him my everything. It was the only way this could work.

Realizing my epiphany, I scrambled up to my room and threw on the first sweater and pair of jeans I could find. I hurried back down the stairs and then ran out to my truck.

The whole ride to his house, my truck was begging for mercy. I was pushing it beyond its limits. The familiar sites that marked my arrival in La Push blurred in my vision and I finally pulled into his driveway. What if he wasn't here? My efforts would be a waste. I grabbed the bag off the passenger seat and hurried up the walk to his house, rapping on the old wooden door.

_Please answer, please answer_, I pleaded with him silently. The rain was soaking me but I didn't care. A few drawn out seconds passed and Jacob pulled open the door. He let out a sigh and then came outside, pulling me along the side of his house to the garage.

The garage felt so familiar. The very place where it all began. If it weren't for this room, we wouldn't be nearly as close as we were now. So much had happened here: growth, friendship, confessions, learning. It only made sense that I would tell him I wanted him - and only him - where we started months ago, where our story's beginnings were written.

He sat me down on a paint splattered work bench and then leaned up against his Rabbit. His arms were folded stiffly across his chest, making him look even bigger and intimidating.

"Just say it. Get it over with," he said gruffly.

"Jacob, I-"I started, but he interrupted.

"But before you do and leave, I just want to tell you I don't regret anything. I don't regret getting closer to you or helping you learn to ride the motorcycle or saving you from drowning. I don't regret being at your house last night and hearing you scream for someone else. But I need an answer. I can't wait anymore for you." His words came out in a rush with his brow furrowed and hands running through his hair.

"I'm sorry if those things hurt you, Jacob. Really, that was never my intention." I paused, trying to gain confidence. "I'm ready. I don't want to wait, either. I'm ready to move forward, move on. I'm ready for us, whatever that may be."

At first he seem genuinely confused, but then a flurry of emotions flashed across his face: surprise, bewilderment, shock, desire. He was silent as I stood up and walked towards him, placing my hand on his russet cheek. I stood up on my toes and brought my lips closer to his.

This was it. The big moment.

Our noses touched and I pressed my lips against his, his heat burning my mouth. I could feel his heart pounding against mine, his warmth taking over me.He hesitated for a moment, but pushed ahead and moved his mouth with mine. It started slow, but then we got comfortable exploring this new part of each other. His hands laced into my hair and he pulled me off the ground. I wrapped my legs around his waist and put my arms around his neck, pulling him closer.

It was a feeling I have never known. I didn't have to be hesitant or careful. No one's life was going to be ended, we had no limits. I felt exulted and like I could take over the world. Our warm tongues darted around in each others' mouths, I more excited and shocked every time. Eventually our lips parted and he set me back on the ground, but kept his arms securely around my waist. We were both grinning, our breathing accelerated.

"Do you have any idea how happy you just made me?" Jacob was smiling so big I was surprised he hadn't exploded.

"If I made you as happy as you made me, then yes, I do." I put my arms back around his neck and leaned further against him, inevitably blushing. He scooped me up and twirled me around, making us both laugh hysterically.

This was right. This was where I was supposed to be. Jacob and I had finally been able to move forward, to progress. He has made me happy for so long, and now I could do the same for him. What I wasn't expecting was that I _liked_ making Jacob happy this way. Being with him like this, in his arms, on his lips, wasn't scary. An overwhelming - but welcome - sense of peace washed over me. A peace I hadn't known in a long time.

My cheeks were aching from smiling so big and he set me down again on the bench.

"And you're sure about this?" he asked concerned, but his smile still broke through.

"Yes, Jake, I'm absolutely positive. This," I said, putting his face between my hands, "is what I want. I want to take everything you're willing to give me and give you everything I have to offer," I said without hesitation. My words rang clear as a bell; no trace of doubt or falsehood in them.

"We need to do something to mark the occasion. Dinner? A date, perhaps?" he said excitedly.

"Aww, come on, Jake. You know I hate getting ready and dressed up and all that shenanigans." I hated to defuse some of his happiness, but making a spectacle of ourselves for all of Forks to see wasn't how I wanted to remember this day.

"Fine. We'll stay here," he said, not sounding at all disappointed. He came over to sit down on the bench next to me and tuckrf my head under his chin. We watched the rain make pools in the mud and drizzle down the windows, occasion giggles of excitement slipping from our lips.

His stomach grumbled and he looked embarrassed, but I just smiled.

"Do you want to come over for lunch? Please, please, please!" I begged.

"No, I want to take you somewhere. You've been feeding me for the past twenty four hours, Bella. Please, please, please," he said, trying to imitate my voice, "let me do something for you. How about a picnic? No one will see us."

His eagerness and excitement was impossible to ignore. "Oh, alright," I agreed. He jumped up and grabbed my hand, walking us back to the front of his house and into the cramped living room.

"You wait here. I'll go put everything together." His elation was so endearing. He hadn't seemed so happy since I'd known him.

I sat down on the sofa and leaned over, peering into the kitchen to look at him. His tanned body was flawless and he even looked warm. His kindness and good nature just radiated off his skin. He looked up occasionally as he ran around the kitchen, throwing food in a basket and I grinned in return.

"I'm going to go set it all up and then I'll come back to get you, okay?" he called from the other room.

"Yeah, sure." I stood up and looked at all the family photos on the wall. There was one of Jacob and his twin sisters at their high school graduation. Another of him and his friends - now the pack - down at the beach playing football. There was one of Billy and Charlie fishing in a little boat at a river upstate. I quickly spotted my new favorite: toddler Jacob in the bathtub with bubbles covering his head like Santa Clause. He was beaming, just like now, and looked so pure and innocent. His hair was almost down to his shoulders, jet black and curly.

I was pleasantly startled when I felt Jacob's arms snake around my waist from behind, pulling me closer and leaning his head down and around to kiss me. This kiss felt just like our first - my breathing and heart accelerated and I was just as excited as last time. I turned around in his hold so I was facing him and again our hands got tangled in each others' hair. Slowly and reluctantly he pulled away.

"Sorry, but I've _really_ gotta go put this down. I'm starving." He leaned in for another quick kiss and headed out the door.

"Don't forget about me," I called jokingly. He scoffed and I could practically hear his eyes rolling.

I turned back to the pictures, looking at the parts of Jacob's life I had never been a part of. One showed him in a bulky red arm cast. His face displayed a frown, but it was so cute it was almost funny. There was only one sad picture - newborn Jake and his mother with Billy gathered around them on a hospital bed. Jacob's face was red and puffy, the true mark of a new life. I couldn't even fathom growing up without a mother. Even though I was the more mature one in my and Renee's relationship, she was still there for me when I really needed her.

"Hey, don't look at my embarrassing pictures!" Jake called from the front door.

"But you look so _cute_," I exclaimed, dragging out the last word. "It's so adorable. I just want to jump into the picture and snuggle you or something."

"You could do that _now_," he said flirtatiously, peering over me. I let out a giggle and walked closer, taking his hand in mine and he lead us to the door.

"Where are you taking us?" I asked curiously. Even though I had spent so much time here, I still didn't know the real geography of La Push.

He smiled back coyly whispering, "It's a surprise."

**-----------------------------------**

**Woot woot! Thanks for coming back! Please read and review. Any feedback is welcome. Why did you like? What didn't you like? Is anything in the story confusing or unclear? Let me know!**


	3. Chapter 3

"Wow. Jacob, this is beautiful." I was in awe at the gorgeous landscape around us. Tall trees surrounded us but I we could still see the beach. Jacob had led us into a small enclave on in the forest, just a few feet from the trail. He sat us down in one of the few dry patches of ground and pulled me into his lap. We relaxed in silence and watched the soft waves slap against the shore. My and Jacob's union had given me true peace.

"Isn't it?" I nodded in simple agreement and let me mind dose. He ran his fingers through my hair, now tangled from the wind. My dazed state was interrupted when I heard Jake rustling behind me. He reached back into the basket and pulled out a tupperware of strawberries.

"Are you hungry?" he asked. I could hear him eating behind me.

"Not anymore." I was too happy to think about anything but him. His presence filled my mind and nothing else could enter my train of thought. Time passed in a weird way - I couldn't tell if seconds or hours had passed. The sun hadn't gone down even a little bit since we got here, so we couldn't have been out here for very long.

I could feel Jacob's glance that was previously on the ocean turn to me. I looked up in response, gobsmacked by everything that he was - his beauty, his love, his care, his compassion... Staring into his eyes made me feel amazing. It was like all weight had been lifted off of me and I was just floating, like nothing could go wrong. He started grinning, noticing my admiring gaze.

"What?" He asked laughing.

"Nothing. You're just beautiful, that's all," I said honestly.

"Pssh," he scoffed. He set me down and quickly stood up. "You want to do something fun?"

"How could we have more fun than we are having right now? I only need to be with you to be happy." It was true. As long as Jacob was around, I was content.

"True, but I want to take you on a ride. How about we go on the motorcycles?" he asked excitedly.

Edward's face appeared in my head, despite the fact that I would do anything to keep it away. Jacob still didn't know my real reason for wanting those bikes and I couldn't tell him now, not when he was so happy.

"Oh, okay," I agreed, trying to sound cheerful.

He bent down to gather own stuff and then clasped my hand, leading me back down the trail. We walked back to his house, him smiling the whole way. I, however, had more troubling thoughts on my mind. What if I had some kind of freak out while riding the bike? I couldn't hurt him just after I made him - made us - so happy. I pushed my negative thoughts away, dumping them with the rest of my sad memories and moments.

Jacob had more bounce in his step than normal. He didn't seem at all irritated my by slow human pace. Occasionally he would laugh or sigh, and I would smile up at him in response. We reached the driveway and he led me into the garage.

"You ready?" He was beaming, there was no way I could disappoint him now.

"Jacob, can I ride on your bike... with you?" I asked hesitantly.

"No, Bella." I heard Edward's voice. I flinched. How could he be back? How could he do this to me, just when I had reached some sense of peace? His voice was so loud he may as well have been screaming at me, even though he sounded rather calm. It rang as clear as a bell. I tried to remain composed despite the mental assault.

"Of course you can. Are you okay? You looked a little worried for a second." His enthusiasm was still there, but more concern laced his voice now.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said as casually as possible. Jacob stared at me for a second and then wheeled the motorcycle out onto the street. I grabbed our helmets and followed behind him. I hoped that riding with Jacob, being protected by him, would keep Edward's voice away. I would be totally safe riding with him, there would be no reason for my Edward apparitions to return.

Jacob climbed onto the bike and turned to sit me behind him. I put his and I's helmets on and latched onto him as tightly as possible.

"Here we go," he exclaimed. Quickly, he turned around and kissed me and then faced ahead. He kicked up the stand and picked up speed.

I listened for the frightening voice, but it was silent except for the roar of the bike. It was a miracle. There was _no voice_ in my head! He had gone away! Edward's voice didn't need to haunt me now. He knew I was safe with Jacob now. I let out a little giggle and it grew to a full laugh. Jake joined in the merriment with me, though not realizing why I was laughing.

I gazed out at the blurring scenery around us and Jake started going faster. Normally I would've been scared at going at this kind of speed, but now it was exhilarating. We winded down the highway, no sound coming from us but our laughter.

Slowly, I lifted my arms from around Jacob and raised them up, spreading them like a bird. A feeling of freedom washed over me. My face was turned up to the sky and I felt a tiny raindrop fall on my cheek. I wasn't sad though - the rain washed away all my hesitation, all my worry. I was at a fresh beginning with Jacob, the rain cleansing me of all my past heartaches. I knew _everything_ wasn't gone, but so much of my pressure and my pain felt like it was finally released.

The rain picked up and I wrapped my arms around him again, leaning my head on his back. His werewolf temperature kept me warm even though it was getting colder by the second. The water trickled down his neck and onto my face, but it felt nice. I breathed in his scent, letting it fill me with a feeling of comfort. We both stopped laughing and just let our sweet moment fill the silence. Just like before, time passed in a swaying, in and out sort of way. I lifted my head, kissing his the back of his neck and then his ear; he just smiled in return.

We pulled back into the driveway, the rain still pouring down on us. Jacob carefully lifted me off the bike.

"Good job, you managed not to fall off this time. Did you get sick of risking permanent blood loss?" He laughed and started walking us back into the covering of the garage but I stopped him, not caring that the rain was soaking us both. It ran down his body like a waterfall. I reached for his and pulled him closer, smiling and wrapping my arms around his neck. I stood on my tip toes and pressed my lips to his, filling us both with the same excitement from before. The rain thundered around us, but it only made the moment better. The more seconds that passed the more passion and urgency we both put into it. He wrapped his arms tightly around my waist, encompassing his body around mine. I pulled away when my lungs ran out of air, sad that I had to break our kiss.

"Thank you. I love you," I said simply, leaning my forehead against his. The words were simple, but they were true, and that was all that mattered.

**-----------------------------------**

**I know this one was a shorty, but I had to go out of town last minute, got sick, and now have make-up work to do for school. I'm so unbelievably, truly, ardently sorry for the delay. Bless you for being patient with me, you can tar and feather me now. Don't forget to review! Thanks for reading!**


	4. Author's Message

Disclaimer: Don't get excited, it's an author's note, but an important one at that, so don't skip it!

Hey guys! I know it's been a **long**, _long_, long time since I posted a chapter. Unfortunately, I've been really busy with school and haven't had as much time to write as I would like. While I do have many sections and scenes of the story written (because I'm weird like that and can't do my outline in chronological order) but I have not finished chapter 4, and don't think I'll be able to any time soon.

So, my question is this: would you rather wait and just read the chapters as my schedule allows me to finish them or should I just post the bits and pieces I have done and fill in the other parts when I have a chance? Or are you guys just too frustrated and won't read anymore (seriously, I would totally understand. I can only imagine how irritating my lack of updating has been)? Please leave an answer and let me know what you would prefer. I've got the story in my head and I know how it goes, so putting it to paper is more for you, the readers. Once I have a clear majority in what to do, I'll post it and let you know when there will be another update.

Again, I really want to do this the way you want me to because all of you have been kind enough not to spam me with hate messages. So, please, please, please tell me what you want me to do.

I really do appreciate you guys sticking with me and being patient. Believe me, I truly want to get this story out. t means so much to me and I really want to finish while it's potent in my head. So, please stay with me while I finish this story. II adore each and every one of you for offering your support, enthusiasm, time, energy, and probably some study time for my story. It really means the world to me.

All my love, Hannah.


	5. Author's Message 2: The Votes are In!

Hi! While I don't have a new chapter for you guys, I wanted to let you know what I'm going to be doing regarding uploads. After getting multiple reviews and PMs, I've decided that new chapters will be posted as my schedule allows me to finish them. Right now I'm working on some school stuff and this week is totally crazy, but next week is Thanksgiving break and I'm definitely going to spending a lot of that time writing. In December, I have a two week winter break. Following the holiday break I will have a two week session of electives at school and won't have any homework, so lots will get written then. So, definitely expect some weekly or every-other-week updates!

With that good news out of the way, it's time to talk about what I'm even more excited about! New Moon is coming out in less than four days!!!!! I have some big plans for the midnight showing. I'll be going with my sisters and a bunch of friends to see New Moon at midnight, but before that I'm going to see Twilight with my parents (my dad's a total Twilight Guy; I think he should start a blog: The Twilight Dad). It definitely be fun!

So, I want to know: What are YOU doing for the release of New Moon? Going with friends? Family? Are you having Twitastic party beforehand? Tell me!


	6. Chapter 4

The weeks passed by rather quickly since our picnic. Jake and I were together whenever we didn't have school and I wasn't working at Newton's. Everything seemed to have just fallen into place; Victoria hadn't come around in a while, and my nightmares and thoughts of Edward were far less frequent.

"Hey, Dad, I'm going to Jake's, okay?" I said quickly as I ran to the front door. I knew he wouldn't mind, but asked anyway.

"Okay, Bells. Have fun, and say hi to Billy for me." He was watching some game on TV and couldn't be happier that Jacob and I had gotten closer.

I was thankful my car made its way to Jacob's house despite its recent problems; tt was making some funny grinding noise whenever I started it. It was a good thing Jacob wasn't as mechanically inept as I was. He seemed excited to fix my truck for me rather than viewing it as a burden.

As I hopped out of my rusty truck, Jake pounded down the driveway and I jumped into his arms, more excited than ever to see him. He spun me around before finally setting me back on the ground.

"Hi," he said with a big grin.

I leaned forward and gave him a quick kiss. "Hi."

He set me down and latched onto my hand. "I'm happy to see you, Bells," he said cheerily.

"Me too." I was smiling so big my face was beginning to hurt. We started walking down the street and then I realized I had no idea where we were going.

"Where are you taking me? You know I don't like surprises," I said, though it was obvious I wasn't at all upset.

"We're just taking a different way to First Beach," he responded simply. He dropped my hand and wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me closer to him. We walked in comfortable silence for awhile and then reached the beach. Jacob sat down in the sand and pulled me into his lap. The ocean was calming, a needed feeling after all the stress we had both been through the past few days.

"You make me so happy, Bella," Jacob said into my hair.

I turned my head to look at him and started laughing.

"What?" he asked confused.

After suppressing my giggles I answered, "Nothing, I just feel the same way about you. You're amazing."

"Well duh," he said smiling.

"Oh, cocky now are we?" I joked. I had forgotten what it was like to have no worries and be totally void of problems. Jacob was my happy place.

"Who, me? I don't know what you're talking about," he said, feigning ignorance and looking up at the sky.

"Mmhmm, yeah right."

The wind blew the sand and my hair in all different directions. I was thankful that Jacob had such a high body temperature - his warmth was the perfect antidote to the chilly beach weather. His shirtless chest added to my comfortably rising temperature.

I felt his hands creep under my arms and then I felt him tickling me. I squirmed and twisted in his lap, the laughter causing my stomach to hurt.

"Ow.... Jake... stop, please.... stop!" I got the words out in between howls of pained laughter. He laughed with me and kept going until I was probably turning purple.

"I love your laugh." He was so perfect, so kind. His feelings towards me were completely ridiculous. I was a wreck half of the time he was with me - I don't understand how this could be at all attractive.

"You're not even totally human. Your opinion on me doesn't count."

He just shrugged and then stared into my eyes. He looked down at me intensely, and I was so happy that it didn't scare me or freak me out. I just smiled in return and laid my head against his chest, simply enjoying his company.

Being with Jacob was so easy. Now that we were together and I accepted his romantic advances, there was no strain between us. There were no limits to what Jacob and I could do together, like there had been with Edward. I didn't have to fear for my life or contemplate immortality anymore. A few months ago that would have been saddening, but now it was a relief.

After a few minutes, a peaceful sleepiness took over me and I fell asleep against him.

In my dreams, I saw Jacob and I sitting on a porch at a house that seemed not too far from the one he had now. The house looked rustic like all the other ones in La Push, but it was bigger and through the windows I could see a wall that was lined with bookshelves. A wooden sign over the front door read, "The Blacks. Established 2010." Our initials, "B" and "J" were tinily carved in the corner of the wood.

The house, which I now knew was Jacob and I's, was surrounded by forest and in the distance I could see a gargantuan cliff. I wondered why it looked so familiar, but soon realized it was the one I had jumped off of not too long ago.

Jacob looked older, more mature, if that were possible. I saw my hand resting in his lap, and on my left ring finger was a simple but beautiful diamond ring. Even with the diamond, it didn't look overtly glitzy; it still fit it in with the rusticity of the Quileute tribe. Jacob's hand was entwined with mine and I saw that he had a lovely gold band on his hand. We were talking, though I couldn't actually hear what we were saying. We both looked so happy and content with each other. We were all smiley and not a trace of sadness could be seen. Not even the typical Pacific Northwest weather looked gloomy with the happy picture of Jacob and me. I was sitting on Jake's lap on an old porch swing and the rain was pattering quietly against the house and windows...

"Bella. Bella, honey, get up," I heard Jake say, his voice getting louder as I refused to respond. He shook my shoulders gently until I was fully awake.

"Bella, I have to take you home, it's getting late and Charlie's probably waiting for you."

I blinked my eyes open and focused on Jacob's face. "Oh, okay."

He lifted me up and took my hand as we walked back up the beach. Jacob had to guide me as I stumbled sleepily.

"Did you know you talk in your sleep?" he asked curiously.

Uh oh. His question brought me out of my drowsy state. I was all too aware of my sleeping habits. If there was any doubt as to what I was thinking when I was awake, people would surely know if they were around when I slept.

"Really?" I asked, pretending to be unaware of this fact.

"Uh, yeah, you do." He seemed surprised that I said I didn't know.

I debated whether or not I should ask what I revealed from my dream. Would he tell me the truth and be excited to share the knowledge of what I envisioned our lives to be like, or would he pass it off as no big deal and tell me I just blathered randomly?

"What did I say?" I asked hesitantly, unsure of if I wanted to know how much he heard.

"Oh, you know, you just talked about us being at a house and stuff," he said, but it sounded like there was more to what he knew.

"That's all?" I was unsure of whether or not I wanted to hear what else he knew. We reached Jacob's house and he helped me into the passenger seat of his Rabbit. It reminded me of the early days of our friendship and I realized how much had changed since then. I went from being a manic depressive and Jacob's friend to being blissfully happy and his lover.

"You mentioned a ring," he said quietly.

"Oh." Why did he have to hear _that _part of the dream? "That's... strange," I tried to sound nonchalant as I said this but doubted that I did it successfully.

Jacob immediately looked rejected, like I had just crushed his dreams. An awkward silence followed and I felt guilty for prying into what he had heard. He looked so saddened by my reaction - that I wasn't excited about envisioning that he and I had gotten married or at least engaged.

Was it my dream to have that commitment to him? That couldn't be it. Marriage had never been an ideal for me. Was my subconscious trying to tell me that I wanted to be with Jacob forever? No, not forever, but for the rest of our lives. Forever didn't sound so appealing anymore. I had to give up too much to get it.

"So, what are you doing tonight?" I asked, desperately trying to change the subject. He didn't respond and seemed like he was in his own world as we walked up the dirt road.

"Jacob, are you okay?" I asked, putting my hand on his arm. I was beginning to worry that I had hurt his feelings. Clearly, trying to avoid what had just happened wasn't the best idea.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, I'm fine," he answered distractedly.

"You know you can tell me anything, right? I won't laugh or get angry or anything like that." I was trying so hard to repair the damage I had quite obviously done, but I wasn't sure that was possible.

"Yeah, of course I know that." His delayed response to the question didn't really seem to match what he was thinking in his head.

"So you're sure there's nothing you want to tell me? Or ask?" I was towing the line of prying and being caring. Did I really want to know how he felt?

"Yes, Bella, I'm fine." He gave me a forced smile and turned his attention back to the road ahead.

"Okay, if you're sure." It was undeniable he wanted to tell me something more, but was too scared to do it. I didn't want to make him feel uncomfortable - I wanted him to feel like he tell me anything with no worries hindering him, but I also didn't want to pressure him into telling me something he didn't feel like sharing.

We pulled into my driveway and Jacob let the engine idle for a few moments.

"Do you want to come in for dinner?" Maybe I could get him to talk about this at my house. A new environment - away from the scene of his sadness - but still a safe one.

"No, I've been gone all day and Billy probably wants to see me." He seemed anxious to leave. I felt guilty for making him so unhappy. He shouldn't feel like he had to hide things from me.

"Okay, well I'll talk to you later then, Jake." I leaned across the consul between our seats and kissed him, hoping that it would end our awkward drive on a good note. At first he didn't respond to me, but I put more effort into the kiss and he finally moved his mouth with mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck and leaned in further, deepening the kiss. A few moments passed and then I heard Charlie open the front door. Embarrassed, I pulled away from him and quickly glanced out the windshield.

"Bye, Jake." I turned and opened the car door, but Jacob reached out and put his hand on my shoulder.

"I love you, Bella," he said determinedly, as if he was trying to convince me of some truth I had not yet discovered. His eyes burned into mine, begging me for something I didn't even know of.

"I know. I love you, too, Jacob." I leaned back in the car and gave him a quick kiss before heading up to my house. I ran through the rain and crossed the threshold. I turned around to see Jacob still sitting there, staring at me. When he realized I that had noticed him he waved to me sheepishly and then pulled out of the driveway.

"What's up with him?" Charlie asked confused.

"Oh nothing, Dad." I hoped my response sounded genuine, and apparently it did because Charlie simply "hmph'd" and headed towards the living room.

"Is salmon and salad okay for dinner?" I called from the kitchen.

"Yeah, Bells, that's fine." Charlie didn't really seem to care and was absorbed in whatever game was playing on TV. I didn't have the attention span to keep track of what sport season it was.

As I pulled the salmon out of the fridge and started getting dinner ready, I contemplated what had happened with Jacob. How could such a simple dream cause such a problem? Maybe because that's not what it was - it wasn't a simple dream. I knew that Jacob had always hoped to be with me, and it only made sense to assume that marriage would eventually become part of it. I again wondered, did I want to have that with Jacob? Could I be his wife? I didn't seem like a prime candidate for matrimony. I couldn't imagine why he would want to spend his life with someone like me. I knew that I was needy, and Jacob deserved so much more than what I had.

And it wasn't just that I would be marrying Jacob, I would be letting go of Edward, too. If I even considered marrying Jake, at any point in time, I would be giving Edward up for as long as I lived. I couldn't do that, not yet.

Could my mindless sleep talking really hurt Jacob? I hoped it wouldn't, but it became quite obvious that it did. How could I fix this? I've already done so much harm to Jacob, it killed me to know that I had caused more. If he still seemed morose by the end of tomorrow, I would talk to him. He couldn't hide his feelings from me forever.

I put the salmon in the oven and rested my head in my hands on the counter. The day had started out so well, and yet it ended so badly. In just a few moments I crushed poor Jacob. I was always hurting him. First it was Edward, then my inability to me romantic with him, now even things I had at least some control over, like dreams, had possibly ruined things between us.

"Hey, Bells, are you sure you and Jake are okay?" Charlie startled me and I jumped as he walked into the kitchen. It was unlike him to display interest in my romantic life, but I'm sure he wanted to avoid another incident like the one so many months ago from happening again.

"I don't know, Dad," I confessed. "It's just... I want to give him so much and I don't know if I can. It's always the same problem - everything will be fine and then something has to come along and mess it up. I feel so bad for him. I'm just worried this... thing," I said, not wanting to disclose the details of the event, "has messed everything up." This was the first time I had ever confided in Charlie. I was never here to do it when I was a child, and was unable to share with him when Edward had come around. There was too much too hide.

"All you can do is talk to him, Bella, and hope everything turns out alright. It will, don't worry." He looked a little uneasy with giving me relationship advice, especially since he hadn't had the best of luck himself, but at this point I was willing to take any help I could get. The house grew quiet and I stared out the window behind Charlie.

The timer interrupted my taut mind and I went over to pull out the fish. For the first time since my arrival in Forks, Charlie helped me lay everything out for dinner. I figured that his sudden help was more out of fear for another emotional downfall than general hospitality, but I appreciated it nonetheless.

"I'm gonna go upstairs, okay? Let me know if you need anything." He simply nodded and I began walking quietly up the stairs. I was about half way to my room when Charlie called my name.

"Yeah, Dad?" My voice sounded tired and wary.

"It's going to be okay, honey." His voice sounded awkward, but I could tell he thought telling me this was the right thing to do. In a way it made me feel better - Charlie knew the Blacks better than anyone and had watched Jacob grow up. He knew how Jake handled things. Still, Charlie didn't know him the way I did. He didn't know about the amount of pain and frustration I had caused Jacob all this time.

I felt tears prick my eyes and wanted to get to my room as soon as possible. "Thanks, Dad," I said quietly to avoid my voice breaking.

I flung myself onto the bed and fought back the tears. I couldn't fix Jacob's feelings now - I didn't have my truck and wouldn't be able to go see him, but he was supposed to bring it back tomorrow morning, so I could see how he was feeling then.

But that wasn't soon enough, I decided. I needed to help him now. I could imagine him sitting at home with Billy in the living room, with his brows furrowed and eyes downcast. In some ways he was so mature: he was always there to take care of me, and he had grown up helping Billy. He could always tell when something was wrong with me and knew how to cheer me up. In others, he was so young and naive: he didn't know how to share his feelings, he got jealous, he had a temper with anyone that wasn't me. The two sides of him were impossible for me to reconcile, but I would never dream of changing them.

I had to act now - deal with it as soon as possible. I grabbed the phone off my nightstand and quickly dialed Jacob's number. It rang a couple times and then I heard someone pick up.

"Hello," Billy's gruff but cheerful voice rumbled into the phone.

"Hi, Billy, it's Bella. Is Jake around?" I tried to sound calm and for once it sounded convincing.

"Sorry, Bella, he's out with the boys tonight. He just finished working on your truck a few minutes ago and then headed out. Everything okay?" He sounded concerned - maybe Jacob had told him about our afternoon. I never thought he shared a lot with Billy, but maybe I didn't know him as well as I thought.

"Yeah, I'm fine. That was actually the reason I was calling. The truck, I mean. I'll talk to him tomorrow then. Thanks, Billy. Have a good night." I was desperate to hang up. I could feel the tears threatening to break through and I knew my voice was beginning to waver.

"You too, Bella. Do you want me to tell him you called?" he asked.

"Oh, no, it's okay. I know he needs his rest with all the stuff he's doing with the pack now. Just tell him goodnight for me."

"Alright Bella, have a good night. And say hi to Charlie for me." I heard him hang up and put the phone back down on the receiver.

Well, if Jacob was out with his friends then he must be feeling at least a little bit better. Especially if he phased tonight; he wouldn't want them to hear about our uneasy event earlier.

After a few hours of tossing and turning, I finally fell asleep, but even in my slumber I still felt Jacob's unhappiness lingering in my thoughts.

* * *

**About the sign in Bella's dream: I went off of Bella's age and the year New Moon came out. New Moon was published in 2006 and she was eighteen. The date on the sign is 2010, meaning that Bella and Jacob got "married" in 2010, when she was twenty two, and he was twenty. I do not mean that Bella and Jacob get married in our 2010 a few months from now, when Bella is nineteen and Jacob is seventeen. Make sense? Tell me if it doesn't!**

**I hope the wait was worth it for you guys. Don't forget to review, and while you're at it, what did you think of New Moon? I was amazed and Kristen's acting was so much better (not that I thought she was bad in Twilight). **


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